how hairy? two words: wookie tits
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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