I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Randomize