Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
