Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
