Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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