i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
