...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
