Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
