Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize