I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
