Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
handjob tips. give me some.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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