Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize