Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Randomize