when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
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No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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