So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
