he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
