After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
