I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
