Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
