i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
that is very illegal...i love you.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
