first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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