Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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