apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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