Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
