moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
