Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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