Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I think weed is turning my hair brown
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
this hospital has no fireball
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
