I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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