Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize