are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Randomize
