I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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