my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
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