Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
pop tarts are not kleenex
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
