why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
