Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
