Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
