dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Randomize
