What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
