she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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