Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
