Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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