Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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