how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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