so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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