your room smells of hookers.
And success
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alive.
So much puke
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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