...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
