HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
