apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
