Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
