he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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