Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
It was confusing and full of hummus
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I think I just sharted jello shots
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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